THIS....IS....TEDIOUS

I have a very limited LoveFilm subscription, only the basic one;  I pay £3.99 a month for 2 films one disc at a time.

I think it would take me about 3 years to get through the list as it stands (despite my C grade A-Level maths I can't be jigged to work it out properly right now) My Lovefilm Profile

I'm pretty crap at watching the films that turn up and rarely making it through 2 a month, however one film I have had in my possession since before Christmas is 300.  And it's a yawnfest. Perhaps subconsciously I knew this and that is why it has taken me so long

There is no denying that the film is visually impressive and it emulates Frank Miller's graphic style well.  The pacing of the film is just so slow however, I find when I'm reading a graphic novel that I get through them at a decent rate but the first time I tried to watch the film this evening I fell asleep.   I tried to blame it on the Dominos pizza. Having shaken off my food coma, I settled down to watch it again; I made it through to the finale and by lord is it depressing.
Have the film's memorable moments have gained a life of their own outside of the film itself? Perhaps. It seems that anyone arriving to the party late would be expecting something else.  Well, I arrived beyond 'fashionably late' and all I got was the prawn cocktail crisps and weak European lager nobody wanted.

Who would truly enjoy this film? I'm not too sure. For violence I would say watch 'Kick Ass'; for naked men fighting try 'Jamon Jamon' for Javier Bardem's nude bullfighting scene alone. I'm not disappointed I saw this film... but it is the quickest I have sealed a DVD back in it's Lovefilm envelope.  I am still tempted to rent 'Spartacus: Blood and Sand' which borrows (read: 'steals') the visual style of the film but chucks in some raunch with the blood spurts.

Where are the Na'vi's genitals?

I didn't really want to see Avatar.  Like Titanic the hype of people claiming it to be the greatest film ever and its huge box office success sort of put me off.  I didn't want to see Mamma Mia for the same reasoning.  I think that I may be a snob in that case and may need to see someone about that.  But an invite to go to the cinema with a good friend and my first 3D experience since Children In Need 1993 and their Doctor Who Special Dimensions in Time, prompted me to see Avatar

And so to the film, well it's good, not bad at all.....greatest film ever?  I doubt it.  What struck me most while watching it was how it reminded me so much of other things.  Aliens is one of my favourite films so I couldn't help but see some of the similarities - the loaders have morphed into gun toting marine outer armour, there is even a classic bitch line 'GET AWAY FROM HER YOU BITCH'  is lovingly replaced by 'YOU'RE NOT THE ONLY ONE WITH A GUN BITCH'.  The plot, bad guy infiltrates the enemy only to find himself on their side and also falling in love with one of them in the end is not original and certain plot points fly out of no where but what truly sells the film to you is the visuals.  The world of Pandora is beautiful and fully realised. The venus flytrap plants on a grand scale, the masses of Na'vi and their language, the floating islands, the animals, all in all very good

Other things that Avatar made me think of was Billie Jean (Jake and Neytiri walking on dayglo moss), Can You Feel The Love Tonight (Jake and Neytiri running through the jungle at night), the animals made the noises of the velociraptors from Jurassic Park and other have pointed out similarities to Fern Gully and Dances With Wolves, but enough about the actual film what about the viewing experience of 3D

Here's a picture of me wearing the rather fashionable Real D glasses. Well the 3D was impressive, the Real D 3D trailer was most impressive and as the film progressed you did get lost in the 3D and towards the end it was less noticeable.  But I found the 3D glasses most uncomfortable both to wear and on my eyes.  I'm hoping that I will get more used to it as I think that 3D cinema is a good experience but how will it translate to the DVD market.  Surely most of Avatar's massive takings is down to people wanting to experience the 3D effects, has home 3D technology caught up enough to allow people to truly experience it on their screens at home?  Time will tell

Until the next time

Hater by David Moody

So here it is the first review - I've just got back from the cinema after seeing Frost/Nixon so I'm doing several bad impersonations of Richard Nixon or at least Frank Langella doing Richard Nixon. And the weather is pretty much a blizzard here right now - anyway I digress

Hater by David Moody

This book was originally self published by the author a few years ago and there is a new edition coming out by Sci-Fi and Fantasy imprint Gollancz in February 2009

Danny our protagonist is not an unlikeable guy but he's more lazy Joe than average Joe but his kids, now there's another story they make me thankful I don't have kids they are just so annoying

Set in the UK Danny is witness to a violent attack of an old woman by a businessman but soon the violence escalates and man is attacking it's fellow humans and the reasons are never clear. Infact no reasons are given in the book, characters speculate but I liked the fact that the reason for the sudden and violent attacks is never fully explained

Danny's story is punctuated by vignettes of violence that are raw and brutally described and they really help to heighten the tension - there is a particularly nasty scene set in a hospital involving a scalpel but I shall say no more- but it may make some men a little queasy

In the last quarter of the book the story takes a turn and moves quickly towards the end - which has been left open for the forthcoming sequels - how the story can and does continue I'm not sure but if it is as succinctly written as this book it should be no slog to get through

The film have apparently been bought by Guillermo del Toro and I look forward to seeing how this is brought to the screen. Yes there is horror and gore here but it is the ordinariness, the banality that makes it shocking. del Toro says 'Hater will haunt long after you read the last page' while it didn't haunt me the adrenalin from the last quarter certainly kept me up at night

This is a blokey book but should appeal to those who enjoyed the films Dog Soldiers and 28 Days Later, but be warned this is not a Zombie book